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Weight loss

Happiness Weight loss

I am never going on a diet again

October 18, 2017

Dear diet industry,

We need to break up. It’s not me, it’s you. Your vile actions have made me feel like I’ve been at fault for the past twenty years. Like I’ve been born into a body that doesn’t deserve the equivalent of a thinner one. You’ve deceived me into spending years of my life thinking I needed to change, and you made so much money off of me attempting to do so.

It started with my chubby seven year old self. I remember so clearly that I looked in the mirror, tugged at the chub on my belly, and thought to myself “this is going to be me for the rest of my life, I’m always going to be fat”. I didn’t think this in a negative manner, it was a very “matter of fact” moment. I should have listened to little Srna back then, but instead I started dieting by age nine. By dieting what I mean is that I wouldn’t eat for a whole day, and then would proceed to binge all the food I could stuff into my little belly at night. I was nine, and that’s f***ed up.
For the next 10 years every doctor I went to, for any sort of medical reason, prescribed me a diet. My parents were so encouraging and cooked my bland meals for me so that I could maybe somehow succeed and be thin like I was supposed to. Why was I supposed to be thin? Was I sick? Nope. I was just obviously supposed to be thin because I had been fed the same “thin is beautiful” spiel over and over. The end of every restrictive diet brought on an even bigger period of binging. The more I tried to lose weight, the more I gained back.

I was so miserable at times, that one time in college I even ordered weight loss pills off of the internet. Fast forward to two weeks later and my hair falling out in clumps, I threw those away and continued to seek another diet. I was really just looking for any possible way I could lose weight.

After college I discovered ketosis, which made me drop weight like a madwoman. I lost 75lbs and looked thinner than I ever had before in my life. I was on keto for a year – a year of no friends, no carbs, no socializing, and getting joy solely out of weighing myself and seeing the numbers drop. I started taking and posting pictures of myself on social media. “Look at me world, I finally cracked the code – I am losing weight”, I would think. In this year, my parents spent an absurd amount of money on diet foods and nutritionists. Anything for health, they’d say. But really, it was “anything to look good”, and I fueled that fire daily. Even at my thinnest though, I felt like I had so much more to lose and I felt as if I didn’t sacrifice my life to a diet I would be throwing it all away. Never to be good enough when I was SO CLOSE. Keto is the most restrictive diet I had ever found, and it made me feel so good that I was FANTASTIC at restricting. Restricting is so hard, and I knew that the only way I could fully do it was in what seemed like solitary confinement. Spring rolled around and I decided to drop keto and enjoy the lovely Belgium with some of the most incredible friends. After not eating carbs for over a year, you best bet that I had a taste (or 100) of everything that I had been missing.

Let me bring you a year ahead, diet industry – I have gained 30 of those 75lbs back and I am HAPPY. I now realize that all of this time I have kept gaining because I have kept dieting. I am now learning to embrace my body for what it is, and to accept it for all it becomes. You may think to yourself, aren’t you scared of getting really fat again? My answer to you is a very honest no. If I do gain weight, that’s alright because I have so much more to offer the world than missing social events because there will be carbs or alcohol there. Does this mean I’m going to stop taking care of my body? Absolutely not!!! I freaking love my body, and I’ve been relearning my approach to food. Healthy food is delicious, and so is pizza. If I want to have pizza, I will get my phone and order it, and that’s totally okay. I have to say though, now that I have stopped restricting food, and now that no foods are on my naughty list anymore, I’m able to have such a healthier relationship with ALL food. My diet is more varied and balanced than ever. I’ll have my pasta, and an extra helping of broccoli because I love that stuff. I’ll eat my morning avocado toast, have my coffee with soy creamer, and enjoy having a glass or wine with friends. I’ll stretch, do yoga, ride my bike, and do all the activities my heart desires – not to lose weight, but to be active and strong.

And my body? Well, I actually learned to love my body a while back, but for some reason I felt like I had to hop on the next diet fad as soon as I heard about it. I have a fantastic husband that also loves and appreciates my body, and that in itself has taught me to embrace my curvy stature even more.

This is my official break up letter, diet industry.

Never yours again,
Srna

 

 

P.S. Now that I’m out of that letter and can actually address all of my readers instead of the diet industry, I just want you to know that it’s okay. It’s all going to be okay. I come from a part of the world where weight is the most discussed topic in day-to-day life, and I’m sure if this blog post makes it there it will be the greatest taboo ever. I embrace this fact, and I encourage more of you to embrace the body positivity movement. Your body is enough the way that it is, and you don’t have to wait until you lose those last 5, 10, 30, or 50 lbs or kilos. You have so much more to offer to the world than feeding into the diet and binge cycle that has been terrifyingly normalized.

I’mma take my curves and go, and I hope you do the same.

Forever yours,
Srna

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Mindfulness Weight loss

Mindful Eating Helped Me Lose 75 lbs

December 11, 2016

Yep, you read that title correctly. Learning to eat mindfully helped me lose 75 lbs and is continuing to help me reach my health goals. By learning mindful eating, I learned to control the emotional connection I used to have with food, and enjoy healthier meals. I wanna share what I’ve learned with you, so that you too can have amazing results just by learning this one simple and effective method.

 

So, what IS mindful eating, anyway?

To put it simply, mindful eating is learning to pay attention to the whole ritual of eating a meal without any judgement. It’s not about guilting yourself into eating healthy, or even differently. It’s just about being aware. I’ve put together a list of questions that you should ask yourself before, during, and after a meal.

  1. Why do I feel like eating? Am I just bored? Am I upset or anxious about something?
  2. What am I going to eat? Will it be healthy, or will I opt for junk food?
  3. What does the food on my plate look like? What does it taste like? Is there a smell? What do I think about the texture?
  4. How do I feel while eating this meal? What about after I finish eating it?
  5. How full am I before I start the meal, while eating it, and after I’m finished eating?
  6. Is there any physical discomfort in my body?
  7. Where has my food come from? Is it from a farm? Has it been highly processed? Is it an animal, a vegetable, a flakey pastry?

Now, the first time I attempted this, I was sitting down with a whole frozen pizza, and as you can imagine, I just sat there and judged myself for my food choices. I felt horrible.
What I did was not proper mindful eating practice, because in mindfulness, one should never judge. With time, I learned to be gentle with myself – and not only that, but I got some really amazing benefits out of my mindful eating habit!

  1. I learned to eat only when I’m hungry. I wasn’t snacking on cookies mid-day because I was bored, and I wasn’t downing chocolate bars because I was sad. I started eating because my body needed fuel.
  2. I learned to cherish the food that I consume. I now take time to really taste the food that goes into my mouth, rather than to chew it mindlessly.
  3. Unhealthy food makes me feel really sluggish and tired, I’ve learned.
  4. I’ve learned to stop eating when I’m full, and not finish everything on my plate.
  5. I treat mealtime as a self-care ritual, and I conciously nourish my body with good food.
  6. Most importantly, I’ve lost a lot of weight. I’ve completely changed my relationship with food in the best way that I could have imagined.

Minfdul eating isn’t the only way I lost all the weight, but it is the one that has caused the biggest difference in my day-to-day life. I wish I had someone simplify the process to me when I was starting out, so I’m really helping that this blog post will help you out!

Enjoy your food, love your body, and take care of yourself.

Srna

Uncategorized Weight loss

Losing 75 lbs – 10 Things Nobody Tells You

November 3, 2016

As some of you may know, I have lost a total of 75 lbs in the last five years. My weight loss process has been slow and steady, but effective. I am still on my journey, and I constantly try to treat my body with love and respect. I will share more of my journey in the future, but for now, here are ten things nobody told me before I started my weight loss.

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  1. Starting is the absolute hardest part of the whole journey. Of course, no one would tell you that when you’re trying to start a weight loss journey, but it’s true. There is nothing harder than getting into the mindset that your life is about to change forever.
  2. You will fail, and fall off the wagon, and binge eat – AND IT’S ALL OKAY. The key to actually losing weight is that you get back up every time you fall down.
  3. There will be nights when you feel like you will never hit your goal. You will cry and scream (or do whatever you do when you’re in despair). Let yourself go through that because as soon as the sun comes up the next day you’ll feel a hundred times better.
  4. The first diet you try probably will not work for you. The second and third might not either. Different bodies lose weight in different ways, and there is something out there that will work for you. Keep searching.
  5. Crash diets will not work. Okay, maybe people have told you this one before, but we never listen, do we?
  6. You can’t do it all at once, and you can’t be on a “diet” for a whole year straight. I’ve come across a few people that have been able to pull that off, and more power to them. Most of us, unfortunately, can not. It’s okay to take breaks, have a cheat day, do whatever you need to do. Just try not to binge and ruin all of your efforts.
  7. If you stick to a boring diet, you will fail. Oranges for lunch every day? Plain chicken for dinner 6 times a week? Say “bye bye” to your diet. You’ll last four days at most and hate yourself after. Make sure that you eat varied meals. The key to sticking with a certain meal plan is to prevent yourself from getting bored of it!
  8. If you stick to a plan that works for long enough, you will see results. The moment you see those results will be the moment you gain HEAPS of motivation to keep pushing. Nothing motivates more than loose clothing.
  9. People will often tell you not to compare yourself to others. Forget that, and seek out photos of people that have made amazing progress and are currently where you would like to be. Study them, look at that, dream about how it’ll feel when you finally hit those numbers.
  10. Remember that this journey is about you. It’s not just about looking better in your clothes, it’s also about feeling better and being healthier. Every time you have a successful week, treat yourself to a non-food reward. Get a mani-pedi, buy a new item of clothing, take yourself to the cinema. Treat yourself for the amazing work you’re doing.

    Left: me, not even close to my highest weight. Right: me, about a month ago.

Are you on a weight loss journey, or are you thinking about starting one? Let me know in the comments below!

xx
Srna